19 years 111 days!
That will be the sum total of the lenght of time that I have been physically separated from Max.
The last time I saw him in person, he was two days old.
Next Thursday, I shall see him again.
I do not think that "excited" is the correct term. I do not think there IS a correct term. The closest I can come up with freaking the fuck out.
I just cannot imagine what it will feel like. I cannot begine to pretend to know how I shall react, if I cry, if I am calm, if I am just a loon...I just can't imagine. I don't feel prepared at all, yet, it is time I know. There is not much I think that we could have done to be more "ready". We have been in contact for almost two years. We took it slow. There is not that huge "unknown", we are not strangers anymore. But still...I cannot beleive that the time is really here.
I have so much to do. And so little time.
Yet it has been a really, really long time coming.
And that shall soon be over.
OMFG!!
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OMG! I am so excited for you! I have been wondering for the last 6 months or so just WHEN this was going to happen and now I know! Many happy visits to you an dMax forever <3
ReplyDeletexxx Sarah
aww, claud, that made me cry. so happy for you. thats wonderful. long time coming and its about time. mother and children reunion is only a moment away....
ReplyDeletebig hugs and lots of peace and love and serenity to you and max as you work towards repairing what adoption destroyed in you both.
It's wonderful and terrifying all at the same time. I remember standing there like a statue clutching my handbag.....
ReplyDeleteYou will do great.
Wishing you all the very very best.
Ohhhhhh Claud, I am so excited for you. I remained pretty calm (on the outside) during the meeting, of course there was a time restraint I had to follow so I wanted to get in as much as I could, but then I feel into sobs afterwards in my car.
ReplyDeleteYou will do great! I am so excited for Max too, that he gets to meet you and see parts of himself.
MSP
Oh wow! How wonderful. I'll be thinking of you next Thursday.
ReplyDeleteWOW - SO excited for you both.
ReplyDeleteWill be thinking of you.
Poss.
Wonderful, just wonderful. :D
ReplyDeleteClaud,
ReplyDeleteI am so happy for you and Max!
There really are no words to describe the experience of seeing your son, again, for the first time.
(I could barely breathe and using an inhaler only made me shake all the more...lol..)
Many good thoughts to you both.
rock on claud! You and your son have been waiting for this moment for SO long. NOTHING will get in your way! xoxoxo
ReplyDeleteholy crap. I cant even begin to imagine what seeing your son is finally going to be like. I'm happy for you and sad too. Hopefully, being renited will bring lots of healing and blessings to you both.
ReplyDeleteOMFG indeed. I'll be waiting breathlessly to hear about it. Sending many good thoughts between now and Thursday.
ReplyDeleteWonderful!
ReplyDeleteYou already know how excited I am for you, but I'll just add that I wish you and Max the very, very best in what is the beginning of a lifetime of making (new) memories together!!!
ReplyDelete~diane
I can not wait to hear how it goes,,, I can only imagine,,wishing you so much luck
ReplyDeletemuch love, ani
Claud you know how I feel...I can't wait to read the new chapters as the story unfolds...
ReplyDeleteDebi
This is so great for you. I hope you enjoy every moment and be completely prepared for the possibility of ANYTHING could happen.
ReplyDeleteI am scared for you... but you are really brave. Try to rest before Wednesday morning. What color did you dye your hair?